The Father's Love

I do everything quickly. I walk quickly, I talk quickly, I eat quickly, I complete my tasks quickly (but not at the sacrifice of quality ;) ). The rapid pace of my life leaves me vulnerable to becoming completely task-oriented and forgetting to take a step back in order to enjoy the little (and important) things in life.

In short, I am an expert at trying to use my accomplishments as a way to gain identity and favor in the eyes of others. I strive to be the best I can be, running and running until I don't recognize my own exhaustion.

These past few months have given me plenty of opportunities to grow in my faith, and have caused me to rely completely on God -- trusting in His goodness, seeking after His will in ambiguous and emotionally strained situations. I am so thankful for these struggles as they have brought me closer to Jesus and have humbled me to see my desperate need for His strength in my incredible weakness (2 Corinthians 12:9).

But for all the things I have been graciously taught by our Father, I continuously forget to rest. I have pressed forward with the mindset that if I study the Bible religiously (no pun intended), do my best in school, and put my whole heart into all I do, I will gain God's favor.

In this mindset, I was talking to God last night in my frustration. I cried out "God, what do you want from me?"

In my heart, I heard three words back:

"I want you."

My eyes fill as I write this, as I remember the relief I felt as the curtain of my own obscure perception was lifted to reveal the incredible depth of the Father's love. In that moment, I saw the amazing grace of Jesus on the cross, and realized what God had been trying to tell me all along: God wants our love. He wants to be with us. Everything else He desires will naturally follow when our hearts draw closer and closer to His.

No more striving. Just love. The love of the Father.

Psalm 51:16-17 "You do not desire a sacrifice, or I would offer one. You do not want a burnt offering. The sacrifice You desire is a broken spirit. You will not reject a broken and repentant heart, O God."

He wants us. He wants our hearts. He wants to be with us, today and always.

How deep the Father's love for us, how vast beyond all measure. That He should give His only Son to make a wretch His treasure.

This, then, is the beauty of the Father's love, illustrated so perfectly through the life, death, and resurrection of Jesus Christ.